Episode 15: Going after your Dreams with Diji Shujahi
Hi! So glad you're here! In this episode, Irene gets to talk with Diji Shujahi. Diji is a proud mother of 2 beautiful teenage girls, and she shares with us her fascinating journey from an arranged marriage at a young age, living a life that was expected of her to where she is now, the managing partner of a successful international Events and Media company, living her dreams. Her main message: follow your passions unapologetically. Stop feeling guilty. This doesn't mean you having to be a mama with a career. If you want to be home with your kids, do it. But do it because you want to. Because you love it. In other words, find a way to do what you love with your time & energy because that will make you happy. And that's what your kids need. A happy mom.
Yes, Diji, yes!!! SO much yes! Our children will not remember all the individual sacrifices we made along the way. But they will remember the energy of the home. Was it a joyful one? Or did we make sacrifices that they didn’t ask us nor want us to make, creating resentful energy in the home?
Diji made some pretty bold choices along her journey. At first, she went along with what was expected of her. But after 5 years of an arranged marriage that turned abusive, and 2 children later, she walked out of her marriage, at once becoming a single mother. This was unheard of in her community and within her family. And later she left her "safe" career to chase her dreams of creating a full-time income from her passion for being on stage. Brave woman. Brave mama.
How'd she do it?
"I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I am a mother and we want the best for our children."
She saw how the abusive marriage was affecting her girls and "as a mother you just suddenly get this kind of courage." She could not let her children grow up in fear. And despite having a happy family & childhood, "I know the things that I've had to work out in order to become better and I didn't want my kids to do that. So that was initially the whole motivation to get out of the marriage but I think every other step as my girls grew, I think I always wanted them to feel proud of me."
I can so relate to not wanting my children to have to "work" on the same limiting crap I've had to. That too is a big part of my motivation to do the inner work. To heal the parts that need healing so I don't pass on those wounds to my kiddos. 100% YES. And I would like to caution that we cannot prevent our children from having disempowering, limiting beliefs altogether. It's not possible. Forming limiting beliefs as a young child is simply part of the human journey. So do the work, for you, for your children, but don't beat yourself up about anything. Your best is enough. Period.
"We are all doing the best we can for our children because as a mother the #1 thing that we have is the well-being and happiness of our child. That's something that just comes from us."
So it will look different for everybody. Every mom is different. There is no "right" way to do life, to do motherhood. There is only the way that is in alignment with you.
Diji shares her experience of getting stuck in the Philippines because of the COVID pandemic and how she fell apart only to find herself once again and in this journey her book, Leveling UP: During a Pandemic was born.
"If anyone can change my life, it's me and that's it. No one else has the right or control on my life."
The book shares "behind the scenes of the scariest time of my life, how I finally discovered that I am not a know-it-all woman, and how not being too proud to ask for help changed my life. I will share some of the great advice I got from professionals and friends, on mental and physical health, loving yourself, and being the best version of yourself."
I think my favorite thing she said was:
"Stop being guilty. Do it because you love it because you want to do it."
I love this. Do what you want because you want to, not because you should or feel like you have to. That only breeds resentment and models disempowerment for your children. She points out that the real lesson our children learn when we follow our dreams is that it's possible for them too. How can we expect them to follow their dreams while not following our own? We can't. Simple as that.
Self-discipline also comes up in the conversation, which I love. I totally agree with Diji that "discipline is the most important thing" when it comes to chasing your dreams because "it takes a lot of discipline" to create what you want. Your dream life is created on purpose. It doesn't just happen. Doritos & Netflix are what "just happen."
At the end of the day, I'm 100% with Diji on this:
"We have to learn to love ourselves. We have to. Through all our flaws. Through all the mistakes that we do."
Because she points out "we live with ourselves the most. We are 24 hours with us." How can we possibly have our dream life if we are not loving, caring for & respecting ourselves? We can't. That's why the work always starts with us. Always starts with love. With loving ourselves. It can't be any other way.
Check out Diji's book here: Leveling UP: During a Pandemic
Connect with Diji:
Websites:
www.dijishujahi.com
www.pinnaclemena.com
Instagram: @dijishujahi
Facebook: @DijiShujahiPage
Diji Shujahi:
A proud mother of 2 beautiful teenage girls, Diji Shujahi is the managing partner of a successful international Events and Media company. She is currently based in the Philippines while managing companies in India and Dubai.
Brought up in Abu Dhabi – UAE, with exposure to a multi-cultural and colorful life, Diji had the fortune of growing up in a talented family who encouraged her to stand on stage and find her voice. Having a loving mother, a father with a passion for producing movies and theatrical plays, and a brother who loves music and choreographed many plays and festivals.
With vast experience in public relations, marketing, media, public speaking, and hosting, Diji has been in the media scene for the past 18 years: Emceeing and hosting TV shows, Festivals, Cultural and government events. She is the host of Women of Arabia and the producer of the My Ride Expo Manila and the YxO Manila TV show.